Trigger warning: This article includes reference to suicide.
In January 2018, my entire world collapsed around me as my little brother, Sam, died very suddenly from suicide at the age of 15.
My life now is split into a before and an after. The aftermath was devastation. I woke up the next day, and the world felt unfamiliar and unkind. Like many families affected by suicide, we asked ourselves whether different conversations, more support, or earlier intervention could have changed the outcome. The constant questions. The constant doubt. The guilt. Crushing.
Eight years on, to mark the anniversary of Sam’s death, I have launched a project called Reasons to Stay. The project connects strangers who care with people who need to be cared for, through anonymous letters. People write about the small, ordinary, human reasons that keep them going. This moment of connection and warmth has the power to break the suicidal thinking that Sam once experienced, and give them the smallest spark of hope.
What has struck me most is how universal these letters are. The writers and recipients come from every walk of life. Mental health doesn’t care who you are, and neither does suicidal distress. Many of the letters mention work explicitly: the pressure to perform, the fear of letting colleagues down, or the sense of isolation that can exist even in busy organisations.
This is where access to mental health support, compassionate policies, and managers who are trained to have human conversations can be the difference between someone suffering in silence and someone reaching out. How can organisations use the human instinct to help in their own culture? It is an interesting question to ponder over.
I feel like occasionally we outsource human interaction too much under the guise of mental health. Obviously there is an important place for clinical interventions, but everyday wellbeing is a core part of interactions we all have with others.
Reasons to Stay is a reminder that people don’t need perfect solutions, they need connection, care, and hope. A simple little idea has created immeasurable impact in the lives of so many. Perhaps the solution to the mental health crisis isn’t so difficult. Maybe it s as simple as a human being speaking to another human being and making them feel seen and heard. All of a sudden, that doesn’t seem so complicated after all.
Ben West is a mental health campaigner
